Tag: Noire

Out-of-context eavesdropping

Out-of-context eavesdropping

 

Catching something completely out of context in public.

It’s the trope that has spawned a thousand episodes of a thousand sitcoms. The Live-Action T.V. section of this fan-driven tropes wiki for out-of-context eavesdropping even suggests that the narrative device “was the plot of roughly 2/3s of the episodes of Three’s Company.”

But much like any cliché or stereotype, it is sometimes easy to forget that they exist in entertainment because they’re circumstances people see in real life.

I’ve found myself glancing over my shoulder on occasion when playing Fire Emblem Heroes, for example.

Looking at you Summer Noire.

The excuse of playing a video game somewhat mitigates that particular fear. We all know the Japanese are a special breed in that regard.

But today I had a slightly different experience in that vein, where the concern was being perceived as some kind of sociopath out of context.

So let me provide context that way you all don’t think I’m a sociopath.

Yesterday I spent a lot of time writing my novel. So much so that I skipped out on doing a blog post.

To make up for it I tried doing a silly gif thing:

Figured I should keep practicing that stuff I learned a few weeks back.

Even though I kept throughout today, I needed a change of scenery. Wound up dragging my Dad out to get coffee at a Coffee Bean in Torrance for a couple of hours.

While we were there I checked my school portal and saw the last two Comm Law assignments we needed to complete over Spring Break were finally uploaded.

I would have preferred to work on them at the beginning of the break… But I can’t force my professors to do things just for my convenience.

Luckily the assignments were quick enough to blow through that I can’t complain.

One of them just happened to come with some bizarre imagery.

For our section on copyright and trademark, a case we went over was Mattel v. Walking Mountain Productions. In which Utah artist Tom Forsythe created a number of images using frazzled Barbie dolls in domestic appliances and common food items to comment on the brand’s effect on society’s treatment of women and gender roles.

All that fun stuff.

Forsythe won the case as fair use for commentary and was later compensated for the legal fees.

A very interesting case, but one that required me to watch videos zooming in on pictures of mangled Barbie pieces in enchiladas and stir fry.

Obviously the “school assignment” excuse would have saved me from any dirty looks. Especially given my ability to at least partially explain why the court case is important in First Amendment studies.

But I definitely would have gotten some dirty looks out of context, and I couldn’t help but look over my shoulder to make sure nobody was peering over the hedges.

Even though I would have more things to worry about if a total stranger was watching me from behind a hedge in a public space, I suppose.

The Fire Emblem Heroes Sacred Summer – Interrupted!

The Fire Emblem Heroes Sacred Summer – Interrupted!

This is arguably the most… Bizarre banner we’ve seen in Fire Emblem Heroes. Possibly ever, in my opinion.

When the banner’s silhouette was first teased out, much of the internet was quick to pick up on the fact that Tana and Innes appeared to be the featured heroes.

After last year’s two summer banners focused on Awakening and Fates, the most recent Fire Emblem titles, this gave me hope that we would have the Summer of Sacred Stones banner.

A special variant banner for my favorite game? What could go wrong!

Well… As it turns out, quite a few things. Sort of.

For some reason Sacred Stones did not get a special banner all for itself. Instead the spotlight is shared with more Awakening units.

It’s an odd choice for sure, especially considering those two Awakening units are also split between a child unit and parent unit who theoretically have nothing to do with one another in any discernible way.

Beyond being fan favorites, of course.

Don’t get me wrong, I love Cordelia as well. And Noire is a unit my friends and I have wanted to see come to Heroes for some time, so I’m not complaining about their inclusion.

It’s just kind of lame that Sacred Stones didn’t get the full spotlight, in my opinion.

But that said the summer heroes were enticing enough to stop me from spending any more orbs on the June Brides, that way I could focus my time on these newbies.

So just how good do these special heroes look? In terms of skills, of course. We all know how they look in their swimsuits.


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CordeliaKnight Paradise

Skill Set:

  • Shell Lance (Might = 14 / Range = 1)
    • If unit initiates combat, grants Attack, Speed, Defense and Resistance +2 during combat.
  • Harsh Command (Range = 1)
    • Converts penalties on target into bonuses.
  • Sturdy Blow (A Skill)
    • If unit initiates combat, grants Attack and Defense +4 during combat.
  • Dull Close (B Skill)
    • If foe uses sword, lance, axe or dragonstone, neutralizes foe’s bonuses (from skills like Fortify, Rally, etc.) during combat.

Analysis:

As I mentioned in my opening monologue, it was kind of off-putting seeing Awakening units show up on this banner. Luckily they picked ones I care about, which helped to lessen the blow.

Especially in the world of Heroes, Cordelia has become one of my favorites. She’s my endlessly useful lance flying unit, and I have a +8 merged Cordelia so far. I also used Bride Cordelia on my main infantry team for the longest time, and she remains my current favorite archer.

Until they add Neimi of course. But we won’t talk about that, because she could’ve easily fit in on a summer Sacred Stones banner paired with Colm.

Cavalier Cordelia leaves me… Apprehensive. She’s adorable for sure, but we’ve been burned with tons of mediocre lance cavaliers before, and Cordelia’s base skills don’t do her any justice outside of that Sturdy Blow.

Hopefully her stat line is solid, because if so I’ll be happy to add her to my growing Cordelia squadron. But if not… We’ll see.


NoireShade Seeker

Skill Set:

  • Cocobow (Might = 12 / Range = 2)
    • Effective against flying foes. If unit initiates combat, grants Attack, Speed, Defense and Resistance +2 during combat.
  • Ardent Sacrifice (Range = 1)
    • Restores 10 Health to target ally. Unit loses 10 Health, but cannot go below one.
  • Attack/Speed 2 (A Skill)
    • Grants +2 Attack and Speed.
  • Infantry Rush (C Skill)
    • Infantry allies within two spaces gain: “If units Attack ≥ foe’s Attack +1, grants Special Attack cooldown charge +1 per attack (Only highest value applied, does not stack).”

Analysis:

So right off the bat let’s get this out-of-the-way. Noire definitely wins the “most revealing and suggestive outfit” award this time around. It’s actually almost to the point of being unbelievable in my opinion. Why would such a cripplingly shy, reserved girl choose to wear what amounts to a couple of crossed straps and loose bits of fabric?

I suppose I shouldn’t complain about fanservice, it is just out-of-place for the character. I’m a man who appreciates character as much as I appreciate revealing anime gals.

Even with that slightly awkward point, Noire is still a unit that has been highly anticipated in Heroes, and her skill set — while not overall perfect — doesn’t disappoint.

Okay that’s not true, Ardent Sacrifice does. But Infantry Rush more than makes up for it. That alone, alongside her anticipated entrance into the game, skyrocketed Noire high into my radar of interest for this banner. She’s just not necessarily a unit I’ll use widely when out in public.

Though I will 100 percent pair her with Inigo. Because best ship.


InnesFlawless Form

Skill Set:

  • Beach Banner (Might = 14 / Range = 1)
    • If unit initiates combat, grants Attack, Speed, Defense and Resistance +2 during combat.
  • Rally Attack/Defense (Range = 1)
    • Grants Attack and Defense +3 to target ally for one turn.
  • Defense Feint (B Skill)
    • If a Rally Assist skill is used by unit or targets unit, inflicts Defense -7 on foes in cardinal directions of unit through their next actions.
  • Goad Fliers (C Skill)
    • Grants Attack and Speed +4 to flying allies within two spaces during combat.

Analysis:

The prince of Frelia is here to upstage Ephraim by showing off his amazing beach-y figure. While I still personally prefer Ephraim, Innes does make a good case for himself here as a rather handsome addition being the only male on this skin-showing banner.

Strangely enough he’s a wyvern rider this time. It’s… Not exactly something I would have ever expected for Innes. But it’s a thing.

He gets some points for having the wyvern design from Sacred Stones specifically, the second showcasing that following Valter. It’s beautiful and it’s my favorite kind of wyvern for nostalgia alone.

Also the fact that I only just now realize he’s voiced by the same guy who does narration for Super Smash Bros. helps too.

I do have to question his weapon. If his axe is a flag, does that mean the actual flag itself is stiff like a blade? Or is he just whacking people with a stick? It’s arguably the most confusing axe design since Summer Tiki brought a watermelon on a stick last year.

What’s that? Talk about his skills? Err… Well…

Let’s just say my interest in Innes relies entirely on things outside of his viability as a unit here. Sorry dude.


TanaNoble and Nimble

Skill Set:

  • Fruit of Iðunn (Might = 14 / Range = 2)
    • Grants Speed +3. If unit’s Health ≥ 50 percent, allies within two spaces can move to a space adjacent to unit.
  • Rally Speed/Resistance (Range = 1)
    • Grants Speed and Resistance +3 to target ally for one turn.
  • Attack/Speed Push (A Skill)
    • At start of combat, if unit’s Health = 100 percent, grants Attack and Speed +5, but if unit attacked, deals one damage to unit after combat.
  • Renewal (B Skill)
    • At the start of every second turn, restores 10 Health.
  • Spur Attack/Defense (C Skill)
    • Grants Attack and Defense +3 to adjacent allies during combat.

Analysis:

Tana joins her brother on this beach vacation and draws a much larger share of the attention. Not just because of her fuckin cute ass outfit, too.

Though that is a huge draw, I’ll admit. Especially when she carries the strangely suggestive modiker of “nobile and numble.”

But Tana is a strong fighter in her own right and brings some new, interesting things alongside her summer gear.

She’s the only hero in this banner whose weapon does not simply bolster all of her stats during combat. Instead it has guidance built-in, which was her claim to fame as a unit originally. On top of that she’s bringing a brand new skill with Attack/Speed Push that gives her a solid stat boost upon her first attack before taking away Health to balance it out.

It pairs pretty perfectly with Renewal, so I don’t necessarily see the skill as being too detrimental. If anything I like the idea of building her as a health regenerating unit!

Especially since she’s coming in with a red tome as a flying unit. Crossing my fingers that she can fill the void left by my lack of a Halloween Nowi.


If I had to rank them, I’d say I’m looking for Tana the most, because favorite game hype, then Noire, then either Cordelia or Innes. I’m a bit split on those two, but I know I don’t want them nearly as much as the prior two.

Actually that’s not true, Cordelia is probably above Innes here. Because she is super cute. Sorry my guy, cute girls > dope wyverns in this game.

I’m starting off this banner with about 150 orbs under my belt thanks to some hardcore saving following the disappointment of Legendary Ryoma, but will the summer units prove to be just as disappointing?

Well.

I guess this is supposed to be an apology, isn’t it?

Honestly I was shocked when Cordelia showed up as my free summon of all things, and Noire showed up not too long after.

Though they don’t have the best stat boons and banes from my best estimation, I ain’t even care. Somehow I managed to get two focus units on a special banner within 50 orbs! That’s awesome.

Granted I still haven’t gotten the Tana I really wanted, but there’s a whole 34 days to summon. That means I can sort of take it easy for a while and make sure I don’t just blow all my orbs in one shot, especially when there’s probably more summer units coming soon.

For real though, sometimes it’s nice to be lucky.

Thanks game ❤️

Now how about we return to the sun-soaked beaches to enjoy some paralogue story, shall we?


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Thinking it over now, I didn’t get a single summer unit last time they were in season. I remember I had been saving up my orbs for other things at the time, eventually culminating in a huge binge to try to summon Delthea.

Thus the only thing I really got out of the last summer session was some nice environmental set pieces and a somewhat creepy storyline out of Anna’s greed.

You’ll be happy to know that both of those things carry on in spades this year.

Yes that’s right, instead of trying to “girls gone wild” some Heroes, this time around Anna is looking to record the sounds of them having fun in the water as something to sell for the Order to make money.

Glad to see some things never change. Don’t stop being creepy as hell, Intelligent Systems.

When the Order of Heroes arrives at the new summer paradise, everyone’s favorite Sacred Stones siblings are front and center. *Snorts*

The first thing they do is argue.

This is so beautifully in-character for both of them that I actually died a little inside seeing it. It’s wonderful!

They even keep it up post-battle.

Why couldn’t I have summoned one of you two.

Oh well, there’s time. In the meantime, we move onto the Awakening units.

I’m not sure who decided to throw Cordelia and Noire together as a set-up for helping Noire get over her mood swings. It’s a bit strange when they could have chosen another child unit like Severa, who canonically helps her out a lot in Awakening’s story.

But hey, if we did that, we wouldn’t get this scene where Cordelia ogles Noire’s body.

That’s not weird at all.

One of Cordelia’s voice lines actually suggests she worries that she isn’t “filling out” her swimsuit enough, so I’m assuming this interaction is just to suggest she’s jealous.

But like. Still, pretty weird.

Way to almost vaguely hit on your ally’s daughter Cordelia.

Anyway you know the drill from here. Noire flips her shit when she loses:

Then everyone gathers together for the final battle on the sunset beach:

Then you win the big battle. It’s actually probably the easiest set of maps we’ve seen in a long time, even on the highest difficulty setting.

But hey battle over and all is happy. Right?

Right??

Naturally, not so much.

Anna is obviously distressed by this because alternate universe Anna (a fact of existence in this universe that I suppose I’m happy we’re just going to gloss over) was going to pay for the sounds she had hoped to capture.

So instead, Sharena suggests that the relaxing sounds of the crashing waves might be worth selling around as well because it reminds her so much of the beach.

Anna is happy about the idea, but Alfonse…

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Less so. Guess it’s up to me and him to find a way to make mone- and it fades to black.

Alright guess that’s it.

Thanks IS for this somewhat uncomfortably enjoyable romp back into summer land. Looking forward to seeing what you’ve got for the next batch.


I’ll be honest with you all, I’m still not over the fact that I summoned two focus units. Even if they weren’t the ones from the game I was looking forward to seeing in the spotlight for a while.

That said, how do you feel about these summer units? Do you think it was unnecessary to split up the game representation this year?

Or are you of the camp that the units are so good anyway that we shouldn’t care?

Let me know in the comments below! And tell me who you want to see taking the beach by storm in the future while you’re at it.